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Wednesday, July 30, 2008

07/30/08 High School To Give Budding Pigskin Tossers "Super Secret Double Probation"


Non-Practicing Lawyer Opines On If Riverside Football Captains Should Be Marched To The Center Of The Athletic Field, Tasered Three Times And Then Arrested And Held On A $50,000 Bail

...I suppose we can talk about the latest tale of wayward boys causing trouble at the high school. According to the Greenwich Time's sanitized version, five "high school football players" tossed eggs at a coach's car over the course of several nights. The coach eventually took down their license number and handed it over to the police, then resigned presumably, the GT would have us believe, out of disappointment over the actions of his players. The true story or I should say, the rumored story, is, as usual with our local paper, far more interesting.

According to rumors, and some of these originate from people who should know, the egging crew included two co-captains of the team and they all pelted the car four nights running. The coach lost his cool and lay await for them on the fourth night, then engaged them in a high speed car chase across to town to Byram or, if you prefer, across the
Tappen Zee Bridge. Either way, he called off the pursuit, turned in the license plate number and was then fired from his coaching duties because his reckless actions had endangered the lives of the kids (who cares?) and any innocent by-standers who might have wandered into his path (that I do care about).

The kids, again rumor has it, although the school denies it, were ordered to run some laps and the matter would have ended there with one fired coach and five sweaty kids. But grumbling arose over the lack of punishment - the kids will continue
playing with the team, for instance - and the perceived special treatment accorded star athletes. So yesterday our Superintendent announced a new round of punishment will be meted out, albeit without specifying what that punishment will be. I'd guess it will be a form of "super secret double probation" but I'd like to see, just to make clear that budding pigskin tossers are treated no better than chair kickers, is them marched to the center of the football field, Tasered three times and then arrested and held on $50,000 bail. Now that would send (some kind of) a message......

Please read more from Chris Fountain:
Please also see:

07/28/08 Greenwich Time Reporting Is So Bad You Can't Even Read Between The Lines In Order To Figure Things Out

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