Why the Town Fathers Won't Allow a Holiday Inn in Greenwich
by Bill Clark
Your scribe has a number of favorite blogs he enjoys visiting, and on one of them he found the following, which he hastens to share with his readership:
NO NURSING HOME FOR US
Guess what, Holiday Inn offers 24 hour service 7 days a week around the clock!!!!!
How is that compared to Nursing Homes rip off??????
No nursing home for us. We are checking into the Holiday Inn!
With the average cost for a nursing home care costing $188.00 per day, there is a better way when we get old & feeble. We have already checked on reservations at the Holiday Inn. For a combined long term stay discount, plus senior discount, it's $49.23 per night. That leaves $138.77 a day for: Breakfast, lunch and dinner in any restaurant we want, or room service, laundry, gratuities and special TV movies. Plus, they provide a swimming pool, a workout room, a lounge and washer-dryer, etc. Most have free toothpaste and razors, and all have free shampoo and soap. $5 worth of tips a day will have the entire staff scrambling to help you. They treat you like a customer, not a patient.
There is a city bus stop out front, and seniors ride free. The handicap bus will also pick you up (if you fake a decent limp). To meet other nice people, call a church bus on Sundays. For a change of scenery, take the airport shuttle bus and eat at one of the nice restaurants there. While you're at the airport, fly somewhere. Otherwise, the cash keeps building up. It takes months to get into decent nursing homes. Holiday Inn will take your reservation today. And you are not stuck in one place forever, you can move from Inn to Inn, or even from city to city.
Want to see Hawaii? They have a Holiday Inn there too.
TV broken?
Light bulbs need changing?
Need a mattress replaced?
No problem!
They fix everything, and apologize for the inconvenience.
The Inn has a night security person and daily room service. The maid checks to see if you are ok. If not, they will call the undertaker or an ambulance. If you fall and break a hip, Medicare will pay for the hip, and Holiday Inn will upgrade you to a suite for the rest of your life. And no worries about visits from family. They will always be glad to find you, and probably check in for a few days mini-vacation. The grand kids can use the pool.
What more can you ask for?
What more, indeed? Sounds like a great idea to your scribe! Unfortunately, there is no Holiday Inn in Greenwich, nor is there likely ever to be one. Why?
Well, just think, dear reader: all those retirees would jam the place and use the local address to get beach cards, vote in Town elections, and perhaps even run for the RTM! Or perhaps some political wannabe will get all his retired friends to move here and vote him in as First Selectman, or State congressperson, or even run against Chris Shays for Congress. Heaven forfend!
No, gentle reader, you may be quite sure that the Town Fathers will never allow a Holiday Inn here in Greenwich. The would-be interlopers will have to make do with Stamford or Mount Kisco instead, which are the only HI's in our immediate vicinity. Whew! Another crisis averted in Town!
Greenwich Gossip - http://greenwich-gossip.blogspot.com/
by Bill Clark
Your scribe has a number of favorite blogs he enjoys visiting, and on one of them he found the following, which he hastens to share with his readership:
NO NURSING HOME FOR US
Guess what, Holiday Inn offers 24 hour service 7 days a week around the clock!!!!!
How is that compared to Nursing Homes rip off??????
No nursing home for us. We are checking into the Holiday Inn!
With the average cost for a nursing home care costing $188.00 per day, there is a better way when we get old & feeble. We have already checked on reservations at the Holiday Inn. For a combined long term stay discount, plus senior discount, it's $49.23 per night. That leaves $138.77 a day for: Breakfast, lunch and dinner in any restaurant we want, or room service, laundry, gratuities and special TV movies. Plus, they provide a swimming pool, a workout room, a lounge and washer-dryer, etc. Most have free toothpaste and razors, and all have free shampoo and soap. $5 worth of tips a day will have the entire staff scrambling to help you. They treat you like a customer, not a patient.
There is a city bus stop out front, and seniors ride free. The handicap bus will also pick you up (if you fake a decent limp). To meet other nice people, call a church bus on Sundays. For a change of scenery, take the airport shuttle bus and eat at one of the nice restaurants there. While you're at the airport, fly somewhere. Otherwise, the cash keeps building up. It takes months to get into decent nursing homes. Holiday Inn will take your reservation today. And you are not stuck in one place forever, you can move from Inn to Inn, or even from city to city.
Want to see Hawaii? They have a Holiday Inn there too.
TV broken?
Light bulbs need changing?
Need a mattress replaced?
No problem!
They fix everything, and apologize for the inconvenience.
The Inn has a night security person and daily room service. The maid checks to see if you are ok. If not, they will call the undertaker or an ambulance. If you fall and break a hip, Medicare will pay for the hip, and Holiday Inn will upgrade you to a suite for the rest of your life. And no worries about visits from family. They will always be glad to find you, and probably check in for a few days mini-vacation. The grand kids can use the pool.
What more can you ask for?
What more, indeed? Sounds like a great idea to your scribe! Unfortunately, there is no Holiday Inn in Greenwich, nor is there likely ever to be one. Why?
Well, just think, dear reader: all those retirees would jam the place and use the local address to get beach cards, vote in Town elections, and perhaps even run for the RTM! Or perhaps some political wannabe will get all his retired friends to move here and vote him in as First Selectman, or State congressperson, or even run against Chris Shays for Congress. Heaven forfend!
No, gentle reader, you may be quite sure that the Town Fathers will never allow a Holiday Inn here in Greenwich. The would-be interlopers will have to make do with Stamford or Mount Kisco instead, which are the only HI's in our immediate vicinity. Whew! Another crisis averted in Town!
Greenwich Gossip - http://greenwich-gossip.blogspot.com/
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